After President Obama's speech to Congress a few weeks ago, my best friend commented that Obama's influence and leadership can be acredited to his great oratory skills. While I think that it's the ideals behind the words that resonate more to the people, I agree that he is an exceptionally charismatic speaker.
This afternoon, I read a book that mentions the three important characteristics of a great leader. (Come to think of it, Obama DOES emulate these three defining qualities!)
*Do YOU possess these traits?*
1. Competence- You should have adequate information, extensive experience and proper skills in your particular field to be seen as a leader. You should be able to impart knowledge and stimulate intellectual growth within your Team. You want to be a credible source of information and be respected for the quality work you produce.
2. Clarity- It's important to have a clear VISION of where you are going. You should have definite goals, with a keen ability to forsee trends, yet know how to roll with the punches. A good leader is flexible and open to change.
3. Communication- Most importantly, to be a great leader, you must be an effective communicator. You must be articulate in sharing information and expressing your ideas. Great leaders are eloquent speakers- with the ability to inspire, motivate and influence with their words.
Unfortunately, many intelligent people (like mad geniuses) are unable to express themselves well. There lies the difference between a merely intelligent man versus a great leader.
But it's never too late to improve your communications skills. Start by striking up random conversations with new people; learn to lead a conversation within small groups in social events; and progress to confidently presenting in front of dozens of people at work.
Competence, Clarity and good Communication are three essential traits for leaders to have. The first two, I would say, are more innate- while the third one can be developed and honed. So go out there and practice, you too can become a powerful speaker.. and the next leader of the free world.
(The book I read was The Articulate Executive by Granville Toogood- yes, that's a REAL name!)
Saturday, April 4, 2009
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Dream BIG
Many great business leaders have said that the secret to their success is simple. They do what the love, they love what the do… and the money soon follows. A man can only achieve and succeed when he does something he is truly passionate about.
While I agree with the original statement, I also believe that it all starts with having faith in oneself and having a dream. Each person has to focus on a personal goal, so he can visualize where he wants to go. He has to believe in himself and his abilities to attain that dream.
The problem lies when a person doesn’t even have faith in himself. If he can’t believe in himself, then no one else will. Building self confidence is important. Having a goal, knowing where you want to go, where you want to be, and believing that it CAN happen is how success is attained.
I know of many people who succeeded simply by SHEER will. They weren’t exceptionally skilled or talented, but their determination and willpower got them to where they are now. A childhood friend of mine is living proof of becoming a self-made millionaire. Although he had a slight advantage in life because his dad already had a small business, which my friend later took over after college, it was because of his confidence, his can-do attitude, and his unwavering faith in himself that he brought a mediocre business to a hugely successful one. I remember when we were 16, he would tell me about his goals in life and all the plans he had for the future. By talking about it, visualizing it, he made it come to reality. 12 years later, he is now the CEO of his own company, with a mansion in the ritziest neighborhood, a helicopter and a yacht to boot! Not a typical story but it happens and it’s true!
So for all those visionaries and dreamers out there, I say keep dreaming! Believe in your dreams, believe in yourself, and all the success will follow.
While I agree with the original statement, I also believe that it all starts with having faith in oneself and having a dream. Each person has to focus on a personal goal, so he can visualize where he wants to go. He has to believe in himself and his abilities to attain that dream.
The problem lies when a person doesn’t even have faith in himself. If he can’t believe in himself, then no one else will. Building self confidence is important. Having a goal, knowing where you want to go, where you want to be, and believing that it CAN happen is how success is attained.
I know of many people who succeeded simply by SHEER will. They weren’t exceptionally skilled or talented, but their determination and willpower got them to where they are now. A childhood friend of mine is living proof of becoming a self-made millionaire. Although he had a slight advantage in life because his dad already had a small business, which my friend later took over after college, it was because of his confidence, his can-do attitude, and his unwavering faith in himself that he brought a mediocre business to a hugely successful one. I remember when we were 16, he would tell me about his goals in life and all the plans he had for the future. By talking about it, visualizing it, he made it come to reality. 12 years later, he is now the CEO of his own company, with a mansion in the ritziest neighborhood, a helicopter and a yacht to boot! Not a typical story but it happens and it’s true!
So for all those visionaries and dreamers out there, I say keep dreaming! Believe in your dreams, believe in yourself, and all the success will follow.
Domestic Violence: Enough is Enough
In the United States alone, a woman is beaten by her husband or partner every 15 seconds. According to a National Violence Against Women Survey, 22% of women are physically assaulted by a partner during their lifetimes and nearly 5.3 million partner victimizations occur each year among women age 18 and older. This results in 2 million injuries and 1,300 deaths in the U.S. alone. These senseless acts of violence are problems that have occurred for centuries past. Even as human rights are established and gender equality has been propagated, domestic violence still occurs today in every level of society.
Even the scions of Hollywood society do not escape the wrath of domestic abuse and violence. During the last couple of weeks, there has been wide-spread speculation and heightened sensation on the alleged domestic dispute between power couple Rihanna and Chris Brown, two famous celebrity icons and role models for young people world-wide. When news broke that the couple had gotten into a violent argument where Chris Brown had allegedly beat up Rihanna, the tongues of Hollywood, and those of the mainstream public, have not stopped wagging. When pictures of a severely battered Rihanna surfaced in gossip internet sites, fans all over the world were shocked and aghast. Once a reputable, clean-cut, poster boy for talented musicians, Chris Brown is currently being charged and on trial for 2 felonies- charges of assault likely to cause great bodily injury and making criminal threats. Flames were fueled even more by news that a few short weeks after the brutal incident, the young couple had reconciled. This reconciliation shocked the public, more than the actual beating itself.
Domestic abuse is intolerable and inexcusable. If rumors are true that Rihanna had gotten back together with the man who had battered her- by repeatedly hitting her face, causing her mouth to swell up with blood, and slamming her face to the window, and even biting her ear- then she is a poor example for strong, young women everywhere. By reconciling with her abuser, she sends a message to teens everywhere that it is forgivable and even tolerable for a man to hit a woman.
Like a double-edged sword, fame often takes away a person’s entitlement to privacy. Famous public figures are no longer accountable just to themselves. Their actions and decisions are watched and judged by the society that idolizes and adores them. Famous public figures, such as Rihanna, have a social responsibility to be good role models to their fans. Millions of young people around the world look up to celebrities- they admire, emulate and worship these famous, beautiful people. As a symbol of a strong, young, talented woman, Rihanna must stand up and show the world that domestic violence is not to be tolerated. If a woman with as much power, fame and money as Rihanna, cannot escape a dysfunctional, violent relationship to a person with whom she is not even married to, nor does she share children with, then it’s a pretty bleak situation for women all over the world.
Unfortunately, statistics and studies have shown that many battered women do return to their abusers. Low self-esteem, helplessness, economic dependence and a contorted belief that things will change contribute to their return. Victims of physical and verbal abuse are often paralyzed with fear, with the belief that they cannot escape from their plight, and all they can do is cling to the hope that one day the abuse will stop.
Ultimately, abused women know that the violence will most likely escalate by their attempts to escape. They are terrorized by the consequences of what would happen if they tried to escape and get caught- even worse beatings by the abuser, or fatal danger to themselves and their loved ones. Most abused victims fear that the authorities are unable to provide them with the support or security they need to survive. Women often feel ashamed and blame themselves for the abuse.
Some battered wives feel bound by moral obligation to stay and work on their marriage, especially if they have children. Abusers have the power to manipulate their victims emotionally and mentally. Often the abusers will beg for forgiveness and shower the victims with gifts and adoration, after the brutal incident has occurred. The woman starts feeling a renewed sense of love for her attacker, and blames herself for the incident.
In many cases, women actually feel genuine LOVE and care for these men that hit them. They want their relationships to work, and they really believe it will be different this second time around, that the man truly has changed after all. However, it won’t be long until this vicious cycle soon starts again. Just as Oprah said during an interview, and candidly sent advice for Rihanna: “If a man hits you once, he WILL hit you AGAIN.”
As a woman, I am here to say that enough is enough. We must not allow men to oppress us with violence and abuse. Rihanna has a moral obligation and a civic duty to society- especially to women and children- to stand up to her attacker and prosecute him. Now more than ever, this is her opportunity to fight for the injustice and unfair treatment of women world-wide. If this kind of violence is deemed acceptable in the United States of America- this country so greatly known to preserve the rights of each individual, where the voice of every man and woman is heard, where all ethnicities are welcomed and embraced- then it may be seen even more permissible for developing countries to follow suit, especially in Middle Eastern nations, where women are still considered as second class citizens. This archaic way of “disciplining” women must be put to an end. It can end, and it will, if each victim stands up and finally says: ENOUGH.
Even the scions of Hollywood society do not escape the wrath of domestic abuse and violence. During the last couple of weeks, there has been wide-spread speculation and heightened sensation on the alleged domestic dispute between power couple Rihanna and Chris Brown, two famous celebrity icons and role models for young people world-wide. When news broke that the couple had gotten into a violent argument where Chris Brown had allegedly beat up Rihanna, the tongues of Hollywood, and those of the mainstream public, have not stopped wagging. When pictures of a severely battered Rihanna surfaced in gossip internet sites, fans all over the world were shocked and aghast. Once a reputable, clean-cut, poster boy for talented musicians, Chris Brown is currently being charged and on trial for 2 felonies- charges of assault likely to cause great bodily injury and making criminal threats. Flames were fueled even more by news that a few short weeks after the brutal incident, the young couple had reconciled. This reconciliation shocked the public, more than the actual beating itself.
Domestic abuse is intolerable and inexcusable. If rumors are true that Rihanna had gotten back together with the man who had battered her- by repeatedly hitting her face, causing her mouth to swell up with blood, and slamming her face to the window, and even biting her ear- then she is a poor example for strong, young women everywhere. By reconciling with her abuser, she sends a message to teens everywhere that it is forgivable and even tolerable for a man to hit a woman.
Like a double-edged sword, fame often takes away a person’s entitlement to privacy. Famous public figures are no longer accountable just to themselves. Their actions and decisions are watched and judged by the society that idolizes and adores them. Famous public figures, such as Rihanna, have a social responsibility to be good role models to their fans. Millions of young people around the world look up to celebrities- they admire, emulate and worship these famous, beautiful people. As a symbol of a strong, young, talented woman, Rihanna must stand up and show the world that domestic violence is not to be tolerated. If a woman with as much power, fame and money as Rihanna, cannot escape a dysfunctional, violent relationship to a person with whom she is not even married to, nor does she share children with, then it’s a pretty bleak situation for women all over the world.
Unfortunately, statistics and studies have shown that many battered women do return to their abusers. Low self-esteem, helplessness, economic dependence and a contorted belief that things will change contribute to their return. Victims of physical and verbal abuse are often paralyzed with fear, with the belief that they cannot escape from their plight, and all they can do is cling to the hope that one day the abuse will stop.
Ultimately, abused women know that the violence will most likely escalate by their attempts to escape. They are terrorized by the consequences of what would happen if they tried to escape and get caught- even worse beatings by the abuser, or fatal danger to themselves and their loved ones. Most abused victims fear that the authorities are unable to provide them with the support or security they need to survive. Women often feel ashamed and blame themselves for the abuse.
Some battered wives feel bound by moral obligation to stay and work on their marriage, especially if they have children. Abusers have the power to manipulate their victims emotionally and mentally. Often the abusers will beg for forgiveness and shower the victims with gifts and adoration, after the brutal incident has occurred. The woman starts feeling a renewed sense of love for her attacker, and blames herself for the incident.
In many cases, women actually feel genuine LOVE and care for these men that hit them. They want their relationships to work, and they really believe it will be different this second time around, that the man truly has changed after all. However, it won’t be long until this vicious cycle soon starts again. Just as Oprah said during an interview, and candidly sent advice for Rihanna: “If a man hits you once, he WILL hit you AGAIN.”
As a woman, I am here to say that enough is enough. We must not allow men to oppress us with violence and abuse. Rihanna has a moral obligation and a civic duty to society- especially to women and children- to stand up to her attacker and prosecute him. Now more than ever, this is her opportunity to fight for the injustice and unfair treatment of women world-wide. If this kind of violence is deemed acceptable in the United States of America- this country so greatly known to preserve the rights of each individual, where the voice of every man and woman is heard, where all ethnicities are welcomed and embraced- then it may be seen even more permissible for developing countries to follow suit, especially in Middle Eastern nations, where women are still considered as second class citizens. This archaic way of “disciplining” women must be put to an end. It can end, and it will, if each victim stands up and finally says: ENOUGH.
Monday, March 30, 2009
GYPSY
For most of my life, I have been a gypsy. I have been on a journey of self-discovery, seeking answers to the burgeoning questions of my existence. I have befriended many interesting people in the crossroads of life, hoping that they will help me find my answers. I had a vague inclination of what I wanted to do, but that vision was an oasis that eluded me in an arid desert. It was only when I made a full circle back home that I discovered where my life’s destiny lies. Now I realize that this elusive dream is within my grasp, and all I have to do is to take a leap of faith- and do it.
Every human being has a great destiny to fulfill, and each one is different. Often times, I have been called a dreamer, a romantic and an idealist. If there's anything I am grateful for, it is my ability to see the world sunny, sparkly and bright. I know that in every defeat I have encountered, there is a priceless lesson to be learned, which will reap even greater rewards in the future to come. We are not creatures that are destined to fail. We despair and we stumble because we are meant to improve where we are weak, to be stronger than we were the first time around.
Fortunately, the word “CAN'T” has never been in my vocabulary. I have never allowed myself to think that there was something I couldn't do- and I have never tolerated people who told me otherwise. I believe that everything is achievable and attainable, but only if you put your heart and soul into it. So find what it is that you love to do. Unearth your heart’s desires and your soul’s longings. And once you do find it, seize the day and create every opportunity to bring it to fruition.
I am a starving artist. I am a writer. I write to inspire, to motivate and to change the world. I write with passion and conviction, reflecting the myriad of life experiences, personal triumphs and disappointments I have faced. I may not end up making millions for it, but if my words have translated the scorching intensity that I felt when it was written, then I already consider myself a success.
BELIEVE. That one word kindles hope, like sweet music from a caravan traveling through the Sahara desert. If you believe in yourself, in your passion, and in your dream, then there is nothing you cannot achieve. Open yourself to new ideas, to new people, to new adventures. Be a gypsy.
“EXPLORE, DREAM, DISCOVER.” – Mark Twain
Every human being has a great destiny to fulfill, and each one is different. Often times, I have been called a dreamer, a romantic and an idealist. If there's anything I am grateful for, it is my ability to see the world sunny, sparkly and bright. I know that in every defeat I have encountered, there is a priceless lesson to be learned, which will reap even greater rewards in the future to come. We are not creatures that are destined to fail. We despair and we stumble because we are meant to improve where we are weak, to be stronger than we were the first time around.
Fortunately, the word “CAN'T” has never been in my vocabulary. I have never allowed myself to think that there was something I couldn't do- and I have never tolerated people who told me otherwise. I believe that everything is achievable and attainable, but only if you put your heart and soul into it. So find what it is that you love to do. Unearth your heart’s desires and your soul’s longings. And once you do find it, seize the day and create every opportunity to bring it to fruition.
I am a starving artist. I am a writer. I write to inspire, to motivate and to change the world. I write with passion and conviction, reflecting the myriad of life experiences, personal triumphs and disappointments I have faced. I may not end up making millions for it, but if my words have translated the scorching intensity that I felt when it was written, then I already consider myself a success.
BELIEVE. That one word kindles hope, like sweet music from a caravan traveling through the Sahara desert. If you believe in yourself, in your passion, and in your dream, then there is nothing you cannot achieve. Open yourself to new ideas, to new people, to new adventures. Be a gypsy.
“EXPLORE, DREAM, DISCOVER.” – Mark Twain
A Graceful Landing
I have never been a conventional female. I consider myself to be a free-spirited wanderer, who values independence and liberal thought. I enjoy heated debates and tend to frown on social convention and its rigors. Thus, it was my natural inclination to live a life “different” from the rest of the world.
For the last 5 years, I have traveled and lived an unconventional lifestyle as a Flight Attendant a.k.a "Stewardess.” As a flight attendant, each day was a different adventure. There were days I would wake up at 3pm to start my day, and then stumble into my hotel room in the opposite coast, just as dawn broke. One winter day, I woke up to the sound of the Pacific Ocean waves hitting the beaches of Zihuatanejo, Mexico and fell asleep that evening as snow fell in the quaint city of Calgary in Canada. Many times, I would wake up in the middle of the night and forget where I was! For the most part, my life was a whirlwind. I was on vacation for half the year... traveling 1-2 months around
Finally after 5 or so years of living this nomadic, carefree life, the novelty had worn off and I felt a burgeoning desire to stay at home and have a stable life. I was exhausted from this erratic, jet-lagged, crazy lifestyle and I was ready to stop living on the road. As luck would have it, a great job opportunity fell into my lap.
The serendipitous moment arrived when my sister mentioned a job opening at a social networking website company where she worked: hi5, Networks Inc. I consider myself a social networking power user, fueled by having many close friends scattered throughout the world.
Although still unsure of my desire to join the “Corporate World,” I decided to give it a chance and, thanks to my good luck, they gave me an opportunity to join their team. hi5 is currently ranked as a top 20 website and is the #1 social network in 26 countries across the world. As the Executive Assistant at hi5, I have the privilege of working with incredibly smart, talented individuals. My coworkers inspire and motivate me to give 200% to my job and produce the best work that I can. I believe in the hi5 team, our product, and the future of this company.
Nowadays, I walk around with Joie de Vivre. Each day is an exciting opportunity for me to learn, to enhance my personal growth, and to get my creative juices flowing. Living in the "real" world and getting a "real" job has done wonders for me. I’m actually excited to wake up in the morning and I’m eager to go to work! Time flies when you're having fun, and my hi5 coworkers make our offices in SOMA a really fun place to be at!
Although I have many fond memories from my previous career, I do not look back longingly, on the roller coaster life I once had. Instead, I am eager to move forward and see what the lovely future, with my new career, has in store for me. After flying freely as a bird (or an airplane?) for many years, I am happy to have landed gracefully in the most beautiful city in the world:
Monday, June 2, 2008
Poker (for the Strong Minded only)
Poker is one of my biggest passions and frustrations in life. Quite honestly, I have a love- hate relationship with the game. I am fascinated and consumed by it, yet oftentimes rue the day i learned to play it. The suck outs, the bad beats, the trap hands, it's enough to drive a sane man (or woman) mad. The losing streaks make you want to lock yourself up in your room and bawl for days. Yet the sweetness of taking down a monster pot when you have the nuts is incomparable... Joie de Vivre (the joy of living!). Or pealing your hole cards and seeing American Airlines at your fingertips.. your heart skips a beat just like the first time you met your significant other.
Poker is such a simple game to play. Yet there are so many complexities that come with playing poker WELL. It is easy to become a poker player, but extremely difficult to become a GREAT one. To be able to execute a well-timed bluff, to accurately reading your opponent's hand, to be able to call a river bet with only ace high, now that is an ART. Watching a great poker player, such as Phil Ivey or Daniel Negreanu, on the felt is like watching Da Vinci paint the Sistine Chapel or sculpt Michaelangelo. It is a masterpiece at work.
Contrary to popular belief, poker is not merely a game for hot-blooded young men with the above-average bluffing skills. It takes an extremely intelligent person- with a strong mind and willpower- to become a successful poker play. They often say that luck plays a big factor in poker. But so does aggression, analytical skills, instincts and courage.
I believe that how you play poker reflects how you are in real life. Are you strong or weak? Timid or aggressive? Patient or trigger happy? Do you like to gamble and take chances or are you cautious and guarded? All the choices you make on the felt can be seen in the choices you make in life. The key to playing poker well is being able to read the situation clearly and benefiting from it as much as you can- maximize your wins and minimize your loss. Just as in life, we strive to become successful, to attain our goals and learn from our mistakes.
This blog is the start of my writing career as a novice poker player (with high aspirations), a certified world traveler (a nomad that lives out of her rollerbag), and a junkie of life experiences (with the infinite drama-dies that come with the everyday life of a social butterfly).
Poker is such a simple game to play. Yet there are so many complexities that come with playing poker WELL. It is easy to become a poker player, but extremely difficult to become a GREAT one. To be able to execute a well-timed bluff, to accurately reading your opponent's hand, to be able to call a river bet with only ace high, now that is an ART. Watching a great poker player, such as Phil Ivey or Daniel Negreanu, on the felt is like watching Da Vinci paint the Sistine Chapel or sculpt Michaelangelo. It is a masterpiece at work.
Contrary to popular belief, poker is not merely a game for hot-blooded young men with the above-average bluffing skills. It takes an extremely intelligent person- with a strong mind and willpower- to become a successful poker play. They often say that luck plays a big factor in poker. But so does aggression, analytical skills, instincts and courage.
I believe that how you play poker reflects how you are in real life. Are you strong or weak? Timid or aggressive? Patient or trigger happy? Do you like to gamble and take chances or are you cautious and guarded? All the choices you make on the felt can be seen in the choices you make in life. The key to playing poker well is being able to read the situation clearly and benefiting from it as much as you can- maximize your wins and minimize your loss. Just as in life, we strive to become successful, to attain our goals and learn from our mistakes.
This blog is the start of my writing career as a novice poker player (with high aspirations), a certified world traveler (a nomad that lives out of her rollerbag), and a junkie of life experiences (with the infinite drama-dies that come with the everyday life of a social butterfly).
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